When it comes to dating, you’re meeting new men, seeing which person would be the best partner for you. So, pay attention to the red flags in a guy.
It’s easy to get swept up at the moment, especially if he’s a smooth talker, and that’s when you forget about the little voice in your head. But, no matter how well the date is going, keep your eyes open for the red flags in a guy.
After the date, if you spot them, go home and think about the red flags you saw. How could they affect your life? If it’s just an annoying act or trait he has, well, we all have them. But if he’s showing he has serious issues, think twice whether you want to go on a second date with him.
13 red flags in a guy to make you think twice
The dating world is a wild one. Everyone has had their own experience when it comes to dating and meeting new people. Most of us meet nice people who are genuine and kind, but then there’s always that one person who comes and ruins dating for you.
Maybe they lied to you or gave you the impression they wanted more—either way, it left you a little heartbroken. I get it! We’ve all been there *well, most of us—some were lucky!*.
If you’re new to the dating world or re-entering it after some time, it’s important for you to know the red flags in a guy. That’s a flag you don’t want.
#1 He’s never been single. Of course, some people have been in year-long relationships and then become single. But then there are also people who chronically jump from one relationship to the next. This isn’t cute. It’s not a trait you want in a partner. If he’s never been single, you should wonder if he’s ever gone through the necessary growing pains.
#2 They expect a lot from you. But they don’t expect much from themselves. It’s common for women to find themselves in relationships where they’re the only ones investing in it, while their partner takes the backseat. If he’s not willing to invest in the relationship right away equally, he’ll never do it.
#3 His exes are all crazy. Weirdly enough, not one of his exes seems to be level-headed and rational people. When he talks about his exes, they’re all crazy and took advantage of him. He’s making himself look like a walking angel, and if the blame is all on them, then you know there’s an issue. [Read: Understanding gaslighting and how to know if your lover is messing with your mind]
#4 They don’t apologize. Run! Run far away! Listen, I dated someone like that, and it’s a nightmare. Everything is your fault, and they will never apologize for their behavior. In other words, you will never be equal to them. Sorry is hard to say, but if he can apologize, it means he’s able to be vulnerable and take responsibility.
#5 They’re not nice to other people. When you’re out for dinner, they’re rude to the staff for no real reason. And though this may seem like not a big deal, it is. If they’re rude to people they don’t even know, then how can you expect them to treat you with kindness and respect?
#6 He’s never lived out of his parent’s house. Now, this doesn’t mean he’s a mama’s boy who’s looking for a girlfriend who’s going to be his second mother. But if you’re someone who’s independent, you want a partner who’s on your level. You don’t want someone you need to carry through life.
#7 No is not an option. At least not for him. Of course, no one likes to hear the word no, but at some point, you accept the answer and move on. But for him, he doesn’t take no lightly. In fact, he’ll keep pushing your boundaries until that no becomes a yes. Not cool. This doesn’t show respect.
#8 He loves to complain. The guy is a chronic complainer. Nothing is ever good enough for him, and though you may think this is a sign of “high standards,” it’s also a red flag. This isn’t about high standards; this is about him whining about his life not being fair. It’s his life! He’s the only one who can improve it!
#9 You have different sexual preferences. I don’t want to say sex is the most important part of the relationship, but it’s up there. If you start to see you aren’t sexually compatible at some point along the date, don’t stick around. If he likes having sex three times a day, and you like having sex once a month, this isn’t going to work.
#10 Everything has a motive. There are some people who are kind and compassionate out of the goodness of their hearts. They want to be kind and compassionate. And then there are people who act kind and compassionate but do so out of an ulterior motive. You don’t want that in a partner.
#11 He pulls you from friends and family. A man should never pull you away from your friends and family. If they are trying to stop you from hanging out with the people you love and trust, this is a huge warning sign that there will be more to come, and it won’t be pretty.
#12 He doesn’t listen to you. When you talk to him, he’s on his phone or rolling his eyes, and we all know that’s not a good sign. Red flag! These are serious signs of disrespect, and it’s not going to get any better down the road.
#13 He makes cruel jokes. Ew. Listen, I’m down for playfully teasing each other here and there, but if he’s making cruel and hurtful jokes towards you, red flag. He’s trying to break you down, and eventually, these jokes will become abusive.
You don’t want to get your heart broken by someone who’s a walking red flag. The next time you’re on a date, look for these red flags in a guy. And if you notice them, walk away.