Biola Makanjuola a Canada-based Nigerian
relationship coach took to her Facebook page to
share her experience of getting pregnant when she was 19 and her marriage to her baby daddy at age 20 thinking a marriage to her child’s father would fix things for her and then separation at 23 due to
emotional abuse and a toxic relationship.
She encourages people who have experienced
similar feelings of despair.
“Got pregnant at the age of 19, was zero’d out,
condemned, alone and lost. Became a mother &
thought it best to make it official with my son’s dad
at the age of 20
Got into unhealthy patterns in our relationship that
led to emotional abuse and toxicity for the most
part. Finally got the courage to separate at the age
of 23 after going through an abortion and Sexually
This started my downward spiral into involving
myself in multiple toxic relationships between the
ages of 24 – 27 Confused, lost, dark, toxic
relationships was my drug of choice. Felt unworthy,
self-esteem dragging on the floor begging to be
picked up, had little or no confidence, gave up my
power to define who I was to other people because I just hated the woman I had become. I constantly
questioned why I was so different and abnormal.
My body defined my worth. I clearly had nothing to
offer. My single motherhood didn’t even help. They
said I couldn’t do any better because of my
baggage. I agreed with them and gave them my
power. It was their word over mine.
Finally got tired of engaging in this toxic cycle and
decided to embrace my difference. At this point, I
was tired! I was sick! I was done! I found my light
towards the end of 2016.
Found the love I had been seeking the whole time in myself. Things started clicking. I found my purpose.
I realized I had a story to tell and was determined to share. I was worthy and enough the whole time and didn’t even know it. I finally found my voice and I
promised myself to speak my truth.
I promised God that if he took me out of my misery
and showed me the way, I will spend the rest of my life serving.
Currently serving and growing a tribe of women
who believe in their power to create their stories
and would do anything to make it happen”.